Line managers shape the day-to-day experience of their team more than any policy. A practical look at inclusive management.
We have probably all heard the saying that people do not leave companies, they leave managers. It is a cliche because it is true. And in the third episode of the neurodiversity series I ran last year with Neurobox, Mark made the case very simply: managers shape the day-to-day experience of their team more than any policy or programme ever will.
That is a significant responsibility. And for many managers, it is one they have been handed without much support or preparation.
We talked about what good actually looks like in practice for a line manager trying to be genuinely inclusive. It is not about becoming an expert in every neurodifference. It is not about using the perfect language or getting every conversation right first time. It is about being curious. Asking questions like "what would help?" or "why is this hard?" rather than assuming you already know the answer. A manager who genuinely wants to understand is already most of the way there.
On communication, there was a practical suggestion I want to share because it struck me as both simple and immediately usable. In any group meeting, some people will have questions but will not feel comfortable raising them in front of everyone. Making it standard practice to say "I am going to stick around for a few minutes after this, come and find me if anything comes up" creates a low-pressure alternative. It costs nothing and it changes the dynamic.
We also talked about change, which feels particularly relevant right now given the environment most organisations are operating in. For neurodivergent individuals, change can be especially difficult, not because they are resistant, but because it is anxiety-inducing. And here is something worth sitting with: resistance to change and anxiety about change can look identical from the outside. Both can present as rigid behaviour or pushback. The difference lies in how the change is communicated. Explaining the reasoning, not just the what and the when, goes a long way.
One of my favourite moments in the conversation was when Mark gave a real example. An autistic employee in a call centre was finding it very hard to manage after particularly difficult calls. The agreed solution was a yellow sticky note on the computer screen. No written message, just the note. The manager knew what it meant. The employee could take two minutes away without having to interrupt a call or wait for permission. Both of them won. Simple, low cost, high impact.
Mark also gave an example from the other direction: an autistic employee who coped with the social demands of the workplace by engaging colleagues on the one topic he felt confident about. The team's response was to avoid him. What they interpreted as a strange fixation was actually him trying, in the only way he knew how, to connect. That misunderstanding happened because nobody stopped to ask what was behind the behaviour.
When managers are nervous about getting it wrong, which many are, Mark's advice was clear. Your genuine desire to help will come through. Nobody expects perfection. And if you do say something that lands badly, the best thing you can do is ask directly how you could have approached it better. That kind of honesty builds more trust than getting every word exactly right.
If you manage people and you want to take one thing away from this, make it this: ask yourself whether there could be another reason for the behaviour you are seeing before you decide you already know the answer. That pause, that curiosity, changes everything.
What does your organisation do to equip managers for these conversations? I would be interested to know what is working.
Jacquelyn Mahoney
HR Partnerships Manager | Connecting and Supporting HR Professionals across Cambridgeshire and Peterborough